Confuse-Ing Inter-Rapture $
Picture appropriated by Probably the Prime Purger, Jesse Perla.
Above we see a childish scribbling, found in purple crayon on
a scrap of loose paper, towards the back of a stack of papers (a
photostat of the Voynich Manuscript). The papers came into the
posession of the High Preestess Indoctrinate-Me, who used this
strange scribbling to discover many GNU things about the true
essence of the Halfy, a mystical symbol which pervades all truth
about the universe.
In the drawing, we can see six Psychick Halfies, six regular
Halfies sharing a dot, a Jewish Star Of David, and what is more, a
reference to the creation of the world. If the child who created
this picture is to be believed, the Halfy was present, and indeed
instrumental, in the Grate MOO's creation of the world. The Halfy,
which has long been believed to be nothing more than a symbol of
certain relations in the world, may turn out to be, in fact, a
representation of some kind of tool which the forces of MOO used to
make an entire universe. If these forces can be harnessed, we may
discover how to create a new universe, and perhaps to escape this
one.
The child, who has yet to be located, was shown to
Indoctrinate-Me in a strange dream in which the child, named Yari,
led her through a long corridor in which this design had been
scrawled over and over on the walls, cieling, and floor. Upon
emerging on the far end of the tunnel, she received a vast burst of
information from VALIS, the earthbound fragment of SUITCAS. The
burst encoded a great deal of information about the structure of a
mystical Chilli-Cheese Chimichanga named "Esoch".
Confuse-Ing Inter-Inter-Rapture #23
If God is infinite, then all religion is Idolatry. Love Is The
Law, Love Under Will, With A Side Order Of Fries. Jesus
commanded us to love our neighbor. The Dead Milkmen suggested,
"If you love somebody, better set them on fire." The Church of
MOO understands the hidden messages from God in these Great
Profits. Burn the Churches!
Communicating even a fraction of this message proved to be
impossible, even to those who had already accepted the divine
nature of Chilli-Cheese Chimichangae. It seemed that the
information had been burned onto her brain from outside. She
retired to her house to meditate on the nature of this symbol, and
emerged with no further understanding than she had had before, but
with a strange craving for Taco Bell.
Devouring a soft taco in the comfort and convenience of a
nearby restaurant, she was suddenly startled when a beam of pink
light burst from the taco to her forehead, filling her with the
intense knowledge that what she was doing was horribly wrong.
Esoch the Chilli-Cheese Chimichanga appeared before her and spoke,
saying:
"You are my children, my offspring of the inconstant Earth.
Yet though I have fathered and mothered you, and into you have put
my sweat and blood and tears, yet still you devour me. In my
myriad forms, you sacrifice me to your own desires and needs, your
cravings and urges. Even you, the High Preestess of a noble lack
of faith, have been filled by a desire inspired by Louie, a
sinister anti-Taco who fell from the pleroma when the Logos
shattered, and resides in the qliphothic domains of Gleb, where its
evil powers from before the dawn of time have even now broken
through to your mind. Do you not remember the fourth commandment,
which teaches that thou shalt not eat no hot dog buns, no matter
what the temptation? Can you not perceive, with the information so
recently imparted upon you by SUITCAS, that this is merely a pale
reflection, distorted by Louie, of the commandment I gave to
Humankind when I created the Earth?"
And she answered:
"No."
And Esoch vanished, and she finished her taco in peace.
There is probably a moral to this story.