Book Of Ambiguity


(Which May Or May Not Be True, False, Meaningless, Or Otherwise)

We would like to apologize for this section. It is the only part of the Book which is not REAL truth. This section was written by The 'Preest' while he was under the influence of the Mind Control Beams from High Orbit, sent by the Xennothemian Commandan t of this Solar System.
The first ambiguity of MOO is how much of this we really mean, and how much of it is a put-on, a joke, a hallucination, or otherwise a mess concocted for the explicit purpose of confusing you. This is the first and most obvious ambiguity the initi ate confronts upon entrace into the ranks of MOO.
As the initiate discovers that there never was an initiation, and that the ranks of MOO exist only as a collective hallucination in the minds of the ranks of MOO, the second ambiguity arises. This puzzle is whether the question of meaning or joke is even a meaningful question, since all truth seems to be defined relative to the nervous system of the observer.
The third ambiguity is whether or not truth is, in fact, relative. As Floyd is fond of pointing out, if truth were purely subjective, then anyone who believed in objective truth would be objectively wrong, but if truth were purely objective, we wo uld never have any way of being sure.
The fourth ambiguity is whether any of the previous ambiguities are real puzzles, or whether they are simply consequences of our way of using words to describe a situation which transcends words, and whether even the concept of truth has any finite ly definable meaning.
The fifth ambiguity is whether the Book of Ambiguities is or is not part of the elaborate put-on that might or might not have any meaning, and in any event might or might not exist.
The sixth and final ambiguity is whether or not any of the logic the thinker put into contemplating these mysteries was valid, or whether it was entirely determined by cultural predisposition, accidents of birth, alien mind-control, elaborate self- hypnosis, or cunningly designed mental viruses invented by the Church of MOO.
The seventh ambiguity is whether or not the sixth ambiguity can reasonably called FINAL when there is, in fact, a seventh. Since the seventh ambiguity is entirely self-referential, this is more ambiguous than it seems at first.

The REAL truth is this: this book poses a question. The first one to figure out what the correct question is, and mail in the correct answer, wins a cookie.