DEAR MISS MANNERS: I used to wonder why my cat never ate the mice
she caught until it finally dawned on me: She was trying to recompense
me for feeding her.
       I read that cats are inclined atavistically to form groups with
this food-sharing etiquette. It seems like she's doing some feline
duty, sharing her food when she's given the rare opportunity to be a
provider (she's a housecat).
       Do you think she expects me to eat the mouse? Or perhaps to eat it
and share it with her? Do you think it hurts her feelings that I just
throw out her gift? Am I being rude? Is there a way to acknowledge the
gift without having to eat it?
       GENTLE READER: Oh, it's going to be one of those days, is it?
       Miss Manners hates anthropomorphic questions. If she so much as
hints that there might be different standards of behavior for people
and animals, she is flooded with letters from insulted pet owners who
tell her about the politeness and sensitivity of the animal members of
their families.
       Fine. But you still don't ask them to set the table or pass the
hors d'oeuvres, do you?
       In an attempt to head this off, Miss Manners will play along,
ignore the distinction (which is probably a huge mistake), and recite
the human etiquette rule. That rule is that although you can offer a
present of food, you cannot insist that the person consume it. So,
your obligations to your cat's hospitable feelings are met when you
say, "How kind of you, but no, thank you."