CYBERMOUSE JOKE SQUAD JOKEBOOK.... FRACTURED CHRISTMAS CAROLS ============================================================== Web Addiction Holiday Sing Along! (Sung to the tune of "Winter Wonderland") Doorbell rings, I'm not list'nin', From my mouth, drool is glist'nin', I'm happy -- although My boss let me go -- Happily addicted to the Web. All night long, I sit clicking, Unaware time is ticking, There's beard on my cheek, Same clothes for a week, Happily addicted to the Web! Friends come by; they shake me, Saying, "Yo, man! Don't you know tonight's the senior prom?" With a listless shrug, I mutter; I say "No, man; I just discovered laugh-a-lot-dot-com!" I don't phone, don't send faxes, Don't go out, don't pay taxes, Who cares if someday They drag me away? I'm happily addicted to the Web! Happ-ilyyyyy, ad-dict-eeeed to the Weeeeeb!!! (Yeah!) .................................................... What Song IS This? Here is a list of 20 well loved Christmas songs, retitled last summer by a bored elf with a wicker sense of humour and a trusty thesaurus at hand. Can you figure out what the original names are? 1. Pallid Yule 2. Castaneous-colored Seed Vesicated in a Conflagration 3. Seasonal Yearning for Twin Central Incisors 4. Blessed Nocturn 5. Arrival Time: 2400 hrs - Weather: Cloudless 6. Advance Loyal Followers 7. In A Far Off Feed Trough 8. Adorn the Gallery 9. Percussionist Lad 10. Monarchial Triad 11. Placid Post Dusk Period 12. Deity Abate You Mirthful Patrician 13. Red Suit Idol On Cross Country Tour 14. Allow Frozen Precipitation Crystal Fallout 15. Proceed and Enlighten on the Pinnacle 16. The Northen Quadruped with the Vermillion Probiscis 17. Query Regarding Identity of Juvenile Descendant 18. Planetary Delight 19. Give Attention to the Melodious Celestial Beings 20. The Dozen Festive 24 Hour Intervals * * * * Answers: 1. White Christmas 2. Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire 3. All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth 4. O Holy Night 5. It Came Upon a Midnight Clear 6. O Come, All Ye Faithful 7. Away in a Manger 8. Deck the Hall 9. Little Drummer Boy 10. We Three Kings 11. Silent Night 12. God Rest Ye, Merry Gentlemen 13. Santa Claus is Coming to Town 14. Let it Snow 15. Go, Tell It on the Mountain 16. Rudolph, the Red-nosed Reindeer 17. What Child is This? 18. Joy to the World 19. Hark! The Herald Angels Sing 20. The Twelve Days of Christmas ---------------------------------------------------- ======================================================================= Please feel free to share Cybermouse Joke Squad jokes. Cybermouse claims no ownership or authorship of the materials presented here. They have been scrounged and shared anony-mousely.. authorship is noted where known. ===================================================================== --------------------------30-------------------------